


Having Fun After Hours

by westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-02-04
Updated: 2006-02-04
Packaged: 2019-05-30 09:34:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15094004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist/pseuds/westwingfanfictioncentral_archivist
Summary: Josh can't hold his liquor.





	Having Fun After Hours

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

 

TITLE: Having Fun After Hours  
AUTHOR: Kasey  
RATING: PG DL, Gen. Humour. Little ESF, but in the sense that he's being   
totally freaked out, not that he's being like, killed in a firey inferno.  
SUMMARY: Josh can't hold his liquor.  
ARCHIVE: Yeah -just lemme know where so I can come take pictures, my little   
baby fic's all grown up and out on its own.  
FEEDBACK: Yes, please!  
NOTES: "Gay Men + Drinks = Fun!! ::Bounce clap clap::" Kidding!  This is   
originated from the tales of this guy (Named Josh, ironically enough) I know   
from drama and what happens when he gets drunk. Enjoy! Oh - and while some   
may think from the previous notes that it would be considered slash, it's   
really not - I still think someday Sam shall either marry Mallory or me,   
so::grins:: Oh, and another note: This is meant to be humour. I'm not   
trying to bash anyone or their lifestyle - like I said, this is based on   
something funny that happened when a friend of mine got drunk. It's nothing   
more, it's not saying anything about my opinions. For cryin' out loud, it's   
all in fun!  
THANKS: To Sarah - my cohort in finding Fun!! ::Bounce clap clap:: 

It was during the first drink that everyone began to relax and forget about   
work. 

It was during the second drink that things got interesting. 

The groaning had mostly subsided by then. Not entirely, but mostly. 

It was no one's fault that a freak blizzard had struck, but everyone was   
finding someone to blame. Sam blamed 1st Lieutenant Emily Loenbrau of the US   
Coast Guard; Everyone else blamed Sam. And so, to try to forget they were   
stuck there all Saturday night, they'd raided the kitchen of drinks and   
munchies, set up a card game in Toby's office, and sat down to play,   
flashlights on-hand in case the storm knocked the power out. 

"Josh…" Donna whined. 

"What?" his speech was starting to become a little less precise. 

"You shouldn't drink anymore." 

"I had two beers." 

"And you're about to have another." 

"So?" 

"So you can't hold your liquor." 

"Sure I can." 

"Donna, leave him alone," Toby said distractedly, grimacing at his hand of   
cards. Donna sighed and slumped back against the couch with a martini.   
"Ante up, guys." 

Josh stood, considering each movement, took his next beer, and walked in the   
direction of his office. Donna stood to follow him. "Donna, let him be,   
he'll be fine," Sam said, tossing a couple chips into the pile. 

"Sam, you've seen him, you know he can't hold his liquor." 

"Where's he gonna go, Donna? What trouble could he get into?" 

"Ow!" Josh called upon slamming into the doorway of Toby's office. "What?"   
he asked as he noticed everyone staring at him, jaws dropped. 

"Josh!" CJ began, choking back giggles. "You're wearing.... " 

"That's my dress!" Donna squealed. 

Josh nodded. "Yep." He stood there with a grin on his face. He had removed   
his pants at some point and put on Donna's change of clothes over his dress   
shirt and tie, looking as though he was wearing a sort of grotesque jumper. 

"Josh, um, why are you wearing a skirt?" 

"'Cause I can." Josh shrugged. "'Cause I'm gay." 

There was a moment of stunned silence. "What?!" Sam demanded. 

"Aw, Sam, don't look so surprised. I figured you'd already guessed!  I figured   
you knew about my crush on you!" 

"Your WHAT?!" Sam's eyes bugged out of his head. So did Donna's. 

"You're beautiful, Sam, you really are, those lips, your eyes, Sam, those   
beautiful sapphires. And you've got great arms, and the pecs, you work out   
more than I do, I guess!  Absolutely beautiful." 

Sam looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "Josh, er, what the hell?" 

"Don't act so surprised." 

"Why wouldn't I be? Josh, all the bills, your talking to Matt, the  
homosexual marriages, gays in the military!" 

"I don't have to worry about that. I'm not in the Army; I'm in 'Saving   
Private Ryan; The Musical'!" He stood up on Toby's desk, a little wobbly, and   
began to sing - if you could call it singing - a song he was making up off   
the top of his drunken head, loudly and off-key with flailing arms. "I'm   
just trying...  to save Ryan!" 

"That doesn't' rhyme," Toby stated. 

"Sure it does," Josh protested. 

"'Trying' doesn't rhyme with 'Ryan'." 

"Yeah." 

"No." 

"Toby, you realize you're arguing with a drunken man wearing a skirt who's   
just hit on Sam about whether or not two words of a made-up song rhyme,   
right?" CJ asked. 

"Yeah." 

"Okay. 

Josh started singing again, to the tune of Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy. "He was   
a sweet construction worker out of Frisco Bay, and he would quite divinely   
dance the night away - he was a sight in tight blue jeans! But then his   
number came up and so he joined the Marines. But then he said 'e was gay, so   
he was blown away by the nervous homophobic boys of Company A!" He finished   
his song with a flourish. "You're not clapping!" he said in an accusatory   
tone. Everyone clapped their hands about five times each, and Josh gave an   
elaborate bow, falling off Toby's desk and landing at Sam's feet. "Help me   
up, Sam." Sam looked afraid. "Help me up." 

"Josh-" 

"I just want help up, Sam, it doesn't mean I'm gonna sleep with you." Very   
reluctantly, Sam helped Josh up, but Josh was unsteady on his feet and   
knocked them both into a chair, Josh landing on top of Sam. "I would,   
though." 

"Would what?" 

"Would sleep with you." 

"Get off me." 

"Okay." Josh struggled to get up and Sam scrambled out from under him. 

"Josh, it's.... you should go to bed," Donna suggested. 

"Okay. C'mon, Sam." 

"No!" 

"C'mon, Josh. Bedtime," Donna said, leading him away. 

Josh broke away from Donna momentarily. "Hey, Sam," he said in a dramatic   
stage whisper. "Once Donna leaves, sneak away and come to my office. I'll   
wait up for you." Donna pulled him away. 

"Okay, I'm not going to his office," Sam said. 

"Good boy, Sam! Lead 'em astray!" Josh called from the hallway. Donna took   
him to his office and set up a little bed on the floor. "Why can't Sam put   
me to bed?" Josh whined. 

"Because I said so." 

"But Donna, it's not fair!" 

"Josh-" 

"You're just jealous 'cause I like Sam and not you." 

"What?!" 

"Sorry, Donna. I know you want me. But I'm gay now." He shrugged as he fell   
into a deep and drunken sleep. 

~*~*~*~ 

Josh rolled over, groaning at his splitting headache. 

He sat bolt upright as his arm hit someone. 

The first thought in his mind was "Donna?" followed by "CJ?" then "or someone   
else?" Which was followed by panic as he looked beside him and saw the   
familiar short dark hair and sleeping form of his best friend. "Oh, shit,"   
he muttered. "Sam? Buddy, uh... " he laughed nervously. "... I was sorta  
drunk last night, and I didn't!  What happened last night?" 

"You mean you don't remember?" Sam asked, rolling over, with a warm fuzzy   
smile and a twinkle in his eye. He sat up, naked from the waist up. 

Josh's jaw dropped, then his eyes began to wander around his office. His   
pants were flung across his desk, Sam's shirt and tie and shoes... his own   
shoes... "Oh, God!" 

"What's wrong, Josh?" Sam asked with a light kiss to Josh's temple (and Sam   
began to truly admire actors as he tried to hide his disgust). 

"Sam!" Josh leapt back. 

"Why are you pushing me away, Josh? You didn't push me away last night, quite   
the opposite." 

"What happened last night?" 

Sam started laughing hysterically, throwing off the blanket to reveal he was   
wearing pants. "I can't believe you bought it, Josh, you're almost as funny   
hung-over as you are drunk." He stood and grabbed his shirt, walking off down   
the hallway. 

"Guess there was fun last night," Josh said with a nod. "Wonder what exactly   
the fun was." 

All of a sudden, as he pushed back the blanket, all through the West Wing   
laughter erupted as everyone could hear Josh's confused shouts. "I'M WEARING   
A SKIRT?!" 

~Fin~

  


End file.
